A Field Report of Sorts

by

A lot of my posts seem to veer towards some level of dreariness or unhappy TMI. So in order to brighten up your weekend (and mine), I provide some minor successes in my dealings with those wascally women. These are my version of the PUA “Field reports.”

I generally have not written field reports for a few reasons: I would feel disloyal in that I am breaking another person’s privacy (I may kiss, but I never tell), I might break my own anonymity if someone recognized the characters or details described, and I really am not good at rendering details (I tend to remember in a big-picture, “sense of things” way).

My First bit of Game (maybe):

I was a very shy, dorky, youthful looking, early twenties picture of beta (or even omega). I was in my first office job, finding my feet professionally and socially (professionally happened much quicker). The office had many young women in the prime of their attractiveness. Any flirting they did was more for the fun of my embarrassment than any possible attraction. Actually such flirting was rare as I was to them the invisible man.

One of those young things needed a favor from me. I forget the details but she wanted something that while part of my job was not my primary function. She wanted it now and not later as “protocol” would suggest. In other words, she wanted to jump to the top of the line.

She approached my desk, leaned in close and let her hand rest on my arm. She performed the short ritual of small talk and then got to what was on her mind. In a slightly breathless voice (she was good) she asked for the favor. She left her hand on my arm and her eyes were full of promise. My nerd-boy brain was spinning and I am sure slight flush suffused my boyish face.

While I certainly enjoyed the experience I understood that it was all a game. I paused (all the better to keep her hand and eye contact) and then told her “No!” I was apologetic and told her I would complete the task by the end of the day (as would have happened for anyone else). It was her turn to pause. There was a moment of surprise (shock?) and then she whipped her hand away. Of course I did not score a lay, I did not even score a kiss, but I did begin my slow journey towards been a man.

Lesson:
I remained a shy and dorky guy. I did not magically become the sex god of the office. I may have detected some mild increase in female respect. In the end little changed, but I did learn a lesson: A man may be an unassuming chump but he does not have to be a stupid chump.

The “Alpha” Chick:

This one is a bit stranger. I am not sure I really understand how it all happened.

She was extraverted, social, and good-looking. She was not hot-babe, but was attractive enough to have plenty of options. For a brief time, I was one of those options.

We met during the collision of two groups. I was with a work crowd and she was with friends. Both groups were mixed male and female. With the shuffling of people, we ended up sitting together. We talked about our respective work, but it was in a more personal (trials and tribulations) way instead of shop talk. She did more of the talking but I was able to get many laughs from her. I cannot say that I ran game but I was attracted and wanted her to feel the same. My guess is that her openness and chattiness (she may not have realized that she, not I, was carrying the conversational load) helped to overcome my shyness and uncertain game (it is only beta guys that need to think about stuff like “kino escalation.”).

We ended up having sex that night. It was my second same-night lay but felt less accidental than the first (the less said about that the better). She was very sensuous and eager without being aggressive. In our conversations before and after she mentioned my “depth” and “intensity.” You can make what you want of that; I am prepared to accept them as good (non beta chump) things.

We did meet (and sleep with) each other again but realized that we were a bit too different. We broke up on friendly terms. Some cynics will say that I was “played.” Perhaps I was, but seeing as I enjoyed the experience I say “So what?” I can always console myself that I was worthy of been played, so I can’t be that bad. Some women want a bit-of-rough on the side; maybe she wanted a bit-of-mild on the side. In any case, I enjoyed the experience and I hope she did too.

Lesson:
I am not sure there is one. Maybe it is that sexual attraction can happen in unexpected ways. Perhaps I just like talking about it. : )

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37 Responses to “A Field Report of Sorts”

  1. brightstormyday Says:

    You’re so cute. 🙂

  2. Default User Says:

    @brightstormyfan

    You’re so cute. 🙂

    Hey! Is that you “Alpha Chick?”

  3. brightstormyday Says:

    😉

  4. Default User Says:

    I knew it!

  5. brightstormyday Says:

    Was I even born when you two hooked up? 😛

  6. Default User Says:

    @alphastormyneg

    Was I even born when you two hooked up?

    Ouch! You may not be “Alpha Chick” but that was an alpha neg.

    I am certain that you were born when “Alpha Chick” and I hooked up. However, if you really were “Alpha Chick” then my troubles would likely have been greater than dealing with an extravert. I guess I would have been dealing with the legal system (or even worse, and angry father).

    [It was a while ago but is not ancient history (and that is all the detail I will share).]

  7. brightstormyday Says:

    I wasn’t born in the jurassic period!

  8. Rebekah Says:

    How old are you, D? Just curious.

    I do think it’s good that you stood up for yourself with breathless above. It makes women look just as silly as men when you see this scenario and it’s reciprocation. But, I don’t think it makes guys a chump for going out of their way to help a girl. There have been a few guys here and there who have volunteered their help to me even though it was inconvenient for them to do so–and I didn’t even ask them. It took them from random guy I work with, to really great guy and human being I work with.

  9. Rebekah Says:

    Mandy is pretty awesome with her comebacks… I think I’ll start taking notes.

  10. Default User Says:

    @meanstormyday

    I wasn’t born in the jurassic period!

    Yeah, I am older, hear me roar.

  11. Default User Says:

    @Rebekah

    How old are you

    I am forty something, with the emphasis on something. Old enough that youngstormyXD felt she could use the “Jurassic” jibe, not so old that I really cared.

    The breathless chick was obviously trying to manipulate me with her sexuality. She was offering the role of prostitute (sex for money/favors) but never intended to deliver the service after receiving payment. While I find it hard to be outraged, I cannot respect women like that. Sadly, too many men fall for that kind of game, thus encouraging it further.

    I am not opposed to generosity and willingness to offer help. However, if a man is helping a woman with the hope or expectation of sexual favors then he needs to reconsider his motives. If he would make the same offer to another man or an unattractive woman that is ok; if not then he is been played. I am not ideologically opposed to chivalry but realize the conditions that brought it about (female submission to males) no longer exist. The guys that helped you may have had no expectations (real good guys), but you were benefiting from a chivalrous code where only one side of the agreement is currently held up.

    [end of Sunday sermon]

  12. Default User Says:

    @Rebekah

    Mandy is pretty awesome with her comebacks… I think I’ll start taking notes.

    Oh great. That will mean two smart alecky women to handle. Will my troubles ever end?

    PS
    Mandy is good with the comebacks. She will do fine with the college boys.
    . . . until she falls head-over-heals in love with a handsome jock that will not put up with her back chat.

  13. anoukange Says:

    you really are quite adorable. And I have a new found crush on you if you are indeed “intense”. 🙂

    “a little mild on the side”……god that was funny.

    I dated the shy, nerdy guy in high school who was valedictorian of is class. He was quite and “shy” but he was an animal in bed. I’m on to you “shy” ones….it’s all just an act! ha, ha…meow.

  14. Default User Says:

    @fanoukange

    if you are indeed “intense”

    It think part of it was that I was different. I imagine that many of the men she met used a Phil Spector wall-of-noise approach to pick up (blah, blah, blah, me, me, blah, blah, blah, me, me, you are kind of cute, blah, blah, blah, me, me. . .). My more restrained manner was a nice change.

    Introversion or shyness does not preclude passion or sensuality. Indeed given their (likely) lower level of experience it may make each experience more “special.” If two people click sexually, then a bit of nervousness (and yes, I am always a bit nervous the first time with someone) may add to the moment. The problem is with the wrong person it can be . . . less than “special.” I was lucky with “Alpha Chick” in that we clicked personally and, later, sexually.

    It may seem strange that a man my age talks of shyness. I mean, we are supposed to grow out of that kind of thing, right? While I remain introverted, I have lost most of my youthful shyness. However, during high-stakes moments I do feel an echoic memory of those shy teenage years. While not petrified, I certainly cannot run cool-guy aloof game. At each stage I feel a certain level of nervous tension. Some may see that as “intensity” (I love those girls), some may see it as dorky (boo, hiss).

    OK I am rambling. That is probably because your “adorable” comment started my brain spinning. That and your cheeky smile(y).

    . . . You are not going to ask for a favor, are you? :/

  15. Linkage is Good for You: My Other Rule 5 Pic is a Rule 5 Vid Edition | In Mala Fide Says:

    […] Default User – “A Field Report of Sorts” […]

  16. Rebekah Says:

    It’s the something that makes all the difference.

  17. Default User Says:

    @Rebnegah

    It’s the something that makes all the difference.

    Hmm! Was that a brightstormy style comeback?

    You are right though, the “something” does make a difference.

  18. brightstormyday Says:

    Rebekah, I feel so flattered. 🙂

    @ Default:

    “Mandy is good with the comebacks. She will do fine with the college boys.
    . . . until she falls head-over-heals in love with a handsome jock that will not put up with her back chat.”

    Luckily I’ve fallen head-over-heels with an engineer that can give it back to me just as good.

  19. Default User Says:

    brightloveyday

    Luckily I’ve fallen head-over-heels with an engineer that can give it back to me just as good.

    Is he like this?

  20. brightstormyday Says:

    I love Dilbert! ❤ Sunday Morning comics.

    Most engineers are like this. This includes my dad, brothers, and ex.

    Oh…ew. I hate these sorts of revelations.

  21. Default User Says:

    @brightgeekyday

    Oh…ew. I hate these sorts of revelations

    What revelations? The shocking revelation that you come from a family of, and have dated. . . [gasp]. . . engineers? :/

  22. brightstormyday Says:

    “Gee, you’re like my dad!” *make out*

    ewwww.

  23. Default User Says:

    @brightdaddygirl

    Gee, you’re like my dad!” *make out*

    ewwww.

    It took me a few seconds to figure out what you meant. I presume you mean that you feel some embarrassment because your current guy has similarities with your father.

    Put away the Freud book. Is that that strange that you would have similar taste in men to your mother? Is it that strange that you would end up with someone that posses a complimentary personality (which of course you might share with your members of your family)

    If you do want to call your new guy “Daddy” during intense or intimate moments do not worry, some guys like that kind of thing. 😉

  24. David Alexander Says:

    If you do want to call your new guy “Daddy” during intense or intimate moments do not worry, some guys like that kind of thing.

    In contrast, I’d stay away from girls like that since I’d presume that they had way too much daddy-daughter play time. I wouldn’t ask her to stop, I’d simply cease any sexual contact with her while looking for a new partner.

  25. Default User Says:

    @David Alexander

    I’d presume that they had way too much daddy-daughter play time

    Oh come on! I think you take it all too literally. It likely reflects nothing more than role-play or some admission the dominance and submission aspects of sex. I doubt it reflects any experience or desire for incestual activity.
    .
    .
    .
    .
    However, if her mother is hot and wants to join in. . .

  26. David Alexander Says:

    Oh come on! I think you take it all too literally.

    The problem is that something in that realm of the sexual sphere can’t be taken lightly, IMHO. Dominance and submission themes are already creepy enough, but adding incest as a role play to fulfill those desires is rather scary and sickening.

  27. Default User Says:

    @David Alexander
    There is a difference between fantasy and reality. The fact that woman enjoy rape fantasies does not mean they want to be raped (against their will). The fact they call “daddy” does not mean they really want to engage in incest.

    The dominance and submission theme can be nothing more creepy than looking her in the eye, taking her hand and saying “let’s go.” Not really that creepy.

  28. brightstormyday Says:

    The whole “Daddy” role play creeps me out. ew.

  29. Default User Says:

    @brightnormalday

    The whole “Daddy” role play creeps me out. ew.

    I am glad. I have no interest* in such role play, but can see where it comes from.

    *See the hot mother exception in an earlier comment.

  30. David Alexander Says:

    There is a difference between fantasy and reality.

    The problem is that some fantasies are far too extreme to be acted out in the real world.

    The dominance and submission theme can be nothing more creepy than looking her in the eye, taking her hand and saying “let’s go.”

    Maybe it’s me, but I don’t see why sex needs to have such things to make it viable for its enjoyment. It makes my head hurt just thinking about it…

  31. Default User Says:

    @david Alexander

    It makes my head hurt just thinking about it

    So long as only your head hurts. ha ha!

  32. David Alexander Says:

    So long as only your head hurts.

    Moral dilemmas can make one’s head hurt…

  33. chic noir Says:

    my “depth” and “intensity.”
    Damn default, you’re packing like that. They say good things come in small packages.

    You can make what you want of that;
    shucks I certainly did. they call you default lexington steele. or maybe Jake Steed.

  34. chic noir Says:

    mandy You’re so cute

    darn str8 he is, so don’t forget who he belongs too 🙂

  35. Default User Says:

    @Chic

    They call you default lexington steele. or maybe Jake Steed.

    LOL. I had to look up those two names. That is big expectations to live up to. Maybe I should call myself DeFULLt User.

    At first I thought you might have meant the work safe John Steed. He packed an umbrella (that is not a metaphor) and would perhaps be closer to the restrained Default User.

  36. anoukange Says:

    the “something” is what keeps a girl coming back for more.

    oh, and I love when you ramble, it gives me even more insight into you.

    Chic Noir: you are a funny woman!

  37. chic noir Says:

    thank you anoukange 🙂

    He packed an umbrella (that is not a metaphor)
    suuure defullt user 😆

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